Does your child struggle with confidence? Lacks self-esteem? Struggles expressing themselves?
Meet Billy!
Billy is a 13-year-old boy who struggles with confidence. When the teacher asks him questions, he rarely raises his hand and hopes that others will be picked first. He shy’s away from challenges and often doubts himself. Although Billy has all the talent in the world, he’s missing one thing, and that’s confidence.
Now Meet Sammy!
Sammy is the opposite of Billy. He is confident, doesn’t seek validation from others and is constantly looking for challenges to improve himself. His friends look up to him, and he is the centre of attention.
So how can we help our children be more like Sammy?
But before we get into that, what exactly is confidence?
In its most basic form, confidence is belief in your abilities and judgment. It’s feeling sure and positive about what you can do, whether it’s tackling a task, expressing yourself, or facing challenges.
At Reformli, our research team found three key aspects that every parent must follow if they want to help their child become more confident.
So, let’s get into it!
Number 1- Give them more autonomy
When we give our children more opportunities to discover things for themselves, not only does it promote responsibility and exploration, but it also improves their self-belief, since they feel they are able to influence their own life path. So, parents, step back and let your child start making some decisions for themselves because that’s what lifes all about! We recommend Providing your child with choices whenever possible. Its these small decisions that will give them a sense of control and autonomy.
Number 2- Set difficult challenges and guide them!
Our children’s confidence is based on their competence. The more difficult challenges and scenarios they complete successfully, the more they will begin to believe in themselves. As parents, the real trick here is to set a task slightly outside of their capabilities and then minimally guide them in the direction needed to achieve the goals.
We recommend Assigning responsibilities to your child. Start with simple things and as they mature, gradually increase the complexity of the tasks. This will build their self-sufficiency and confidence.
We know how tempting it can be to help your child at the slightest sign of discomfort, but always remember that in the long term, it does not help them. So, next time your child starts a task, make sure you push them out of their comfort zone.
Number 3 – Their mindset
This is often the most overlooked aspect of confidence that parents neglect. Your child’s actions are a product of what goes on in their head! Their thoughts become words, and words become actions. As parents, we need to instil a mindset of resilience and belief in our children’s minds, and this is best done by encouraging risk-taking. The more they push themselves outside their boundaries and achieve success, the more resilient they are likely to become.
It’s these three things that, when combined, we as parents can really start to influence our child’s confidence and have them acting more like Sammy instead of Billy.